Dibs in the Independant

maddog davis · **Posted:** Tue Aug 25, 2009 8:07 pm

uncle sams on mars bars

Clumsy Alchemist · **Posted:** Tue Aug 25, 2009 8:54 pm

All I said was Dibs had a nice photo in the Independant.

stevie k · **Joined:** Mon Feb 04, 2008 6:14 pm **Posts:** 1323

witchwood wrote:

Is there no topic on this forum safe.

Perhaps we should have a humourous quips page.

I allways thought they all were.......... A young girl walks in her parents bedroom one night and sees her mum astride her dad on the bed, What are you doing mum, she asks. Its ok honey she says, I"m just flattening daddys tummy. I wouldn"t bother with that, her daughter states, the Au Pair will be along shortly and blow it up again.

maddog davis · **Posted:** Wed Aug 26, 2009 5:41 pm

I was walking past the local flower shop the other day and saw a big sign saying closing down everything must go.does this mean i;m welcome to the fushia :?:

stevie k · **Joined:** Mon Feb 04, 2008 6:14 pm **Posts:** 1323

ok.....um..... "Please miss, I"ve hurt my finger", said little Rosie to her teacher. Have you got any cider?. Puzzled the teacher asked why she wanted cider. "Because I heard my sister telling her friend that when she gets a prick in her hand she allways puts it inside her".

maddog davis · **Posted:** Wed Aug 26, 2009 6:37 pm

what do you sall a 3 foot tall rastafarian :?:

a yardie

Clumsy Alchemist · **Posted:** Thu Aug 27, 2009 10:04 pm

A cowboy walks into a German car showroom and says "audi".

Ade · **Posted:** Thu Aug 27, 2009 10:09 pm

I saw a R.A.C van this morning , the bloke in it looked really miserable , i asked him if he was ok , and he burst into tears , i thought , o dear he's heading for a breakdown .

Tony GT Bowley · **Joined:** Sat Dec 06, 2008 9:46 pm **Posts:** 33

This thred has got totally lost and mad, so I must join in, only in honour of Mr Dibs you understand;
Mummy, Mummy, is it true the au pare comes apart?
Of course not Johnny, why do you ask such a silly question,
Cos I just heard daddy telling her that when you go out he is going to screw the arse off her.

Ace · **Posted:** Fri Sep 04, 2009 11:08 pm

Butter is deep...

Hawkonline · **Joined:** Thu Dec 11, 2008 8:19 pm **Posts:** 93

Toaster Machine
Toaster of the Universe

Hawkwind doing butter adverts? That'd be T.V. Suicide....

barnetquark · **Posted:** Wed Oct 07, 2009 10:36 pm

But it might leave a Kerrygolden void.

Isleofwight · **Posted:** Fri Oct 09, 2009 3:29 pm

Quark Strangeness and Charmin

Isleofwight · **Posted:** Fri Oct 09, 2009 3:33 pm

Rocky Paths Bar

Fable · **Joined:** Fri Nov 30, 2007 1:27 am **Posts:** 20

Clumsy Alchemist wrote:

What about a reality show?

How about the Hawk Factor!! Over what seems like a million weeks members of the public can audition for a part in the band ranging from virtuoso guitar player to Bez like dancing fool. The winner gets a gig with the band and can defrock Simon Cowell on prime time TV. (Dream on) It would certainly up the profile. (I'm going back to my cell now) :roll:

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